Staff Volunteer
COURSE PARTICIPANT 2019
When I came into recovery from alcohol addiction in 1989, I realized very quickly that I could not communicate very easily with people. You would not have noticed this as it was cleverly disguised behind a veil of, either aloofness or over friendliness, both of which left me numb with self-loathing and terror. I was anchored into a twelve step programme for recovery. This supported me and helped me with acceptance of myself, through honest disclosure and identification with others.
At this point I was also beginning to make a deeper connection with the natural environment. I moved out to the country and experienced real darkness; the kind that when you turn out the light you can feel it’s alive and thick, like treacle. I planted a vegetable garden and harvested turf for the open fire.
More and more I moved out into the surrounding hills, where time is lost to the seasons and the rhythm of the rising and setting sun. Sometimes I got lost so I learned to navigate with map and compass as well as naturally. I realised that I often felt safer on my own out there, than in a crowd of people. Today I know how wonderful it is that I can choose to be with others or remain alone in the richness of the natural world.
I returned to education in 1997 to further develop my outdoor interests. At this point I was living in an established relationship with Sam, my partner to this day. Sam supported me on different outdoor projects. Our family quickly grew and became six. They were reared on camping and outdoor living. They are mostly grown up now but still keen on coming along when an opportunity arises. My focus in recovery has always been on introducing people of all abilities to outdoor living.
I heard about Write to Freedom from a friend in recovery. I decided to check it out and came on a residential in April 2019. It was obvious from the staff team, the care and kindness, as well as the number of volunteers on the weekend that this was something special. I knew the importance of the natural world in my own recovery. Now I am exploring this with friends and continue sharing these experiences with others.
Colm.